Young Adults Living at Home
I would like to have some opinions in regards to young adults living with parent/parents .
My 24 year old still lives with me . He works full time . He feels that he pays his car payment and car insurance and therefore feels he owes nothing for household expenses.
What are some of your thoughts .
Thank you
HGM As Judge Judy would say I don't care what you (he) feel! LOL
You as the parent and homeowner allow your son to live there without contributing to the household expenses. That is a decision that is totally yours. If you want him to contribute then you must insist. Clearly in this god awful economy and absurd housing market it would be very difficult for any young person to venture out and rent or buy. He should realize the luxury of living home and be willing help support the household. His other expenses are his alone and it was his decision to take on. That is not your concern.
In my opinion of course.
Greg My adult son moved in with me several years ago due to his financial and personal difficulties. We agreed right from the start that he would contribute a modest amount per week to help with the increase in the grocery, water, and electric bills. it's a lot less than renting an apartment. He does his own laundry, pays his other personal bills, and helps with lawn care or shoveling snow, etc. Just common concern and caring for his mother. I cook occasionally, but providing meals is not part of our deal. Since I'm up there in years, it's nice to have someone around.
My situation might be very different from yours. I'm retired, living on a fixed income. But to just seems to me that your son should appreciate you helping him out with a place to live and he should be willing to contribute financially. I'm sure you're not going to "rip him off" by overcharging him.
Lonesome Dove Charge him rent… then secretly open a savings account with the money you receive in rent monthly. Then once he does move out give him that money back to him… my 2 cents.
LibertyThinker LT: I like.
I have gone both ways over the years however, if possible, would rather just provide work opportunities to pay off room and board.
In my case, they were there in order to save enough money to move out again, and personally, I was not looking to slow that process for both of us.
Babbit I would tend to agree with LT as long as you can afford it! But I would caution, if he puts up a fuss about it, then still charge him and use the money for you or just say there's the door. It should teach him responsibility and respect for you.
Mr 4Paws At 24 he is an adult and should pay rent. If he feels that is unfair then he can move out and rent an apartment or a room somewhere else. His choice. Either pay you or someone else. Why would he expect free living? Yes cost of housing is expensive, get a roommate.
Sorry, as you can see I have some pretty strong feelings about this. LOL
happycamper happycamper ---- sometimes I like to pay it forward. Like I do this for you, now you do it going forward to the next generation.
Really killed me on college, more kids than my parents, maybe I should have rethought that plan :>) But I got the gift and they did too and now they need to pay it forward. Circle of life.
We call it the curse...... I give you this, and the curse is now you must pay it forward. And we are pretty clear that it's their burden to bear the gift.
In my humble opinion, we as a culture have unrealistic expectations of our young people. It is to the advantage of consumerism for young people to have rent, car payments, car insurance etc. as soon as possible. It is a recipe for debt that may already be huge if there are student loans.
Extended families, (young adults, grandparents, small children) were the norm less than fifty years ago. Now, with the fastest growing population being 65+, many people are finding themselves wondering who will be around to assist them as they age, hopefully in place. This void contributes to the market for expensive assisted living facilities.
Designing a plan that works for your family, with shared responsibilities and clearly defined expectations, can create a strong foundation for family dynamics, and provide much needed time for saving, building credit both financially and professionally, and an opportunity to develop wonderful lifelong relationships with adult offspring.
MAN "Designing a plan that works for your family, with shared responsibilities and clearly defined expectations, can create a strong foundation for family dynamics, and provide much needed time for saving, building credit both financially and professionally, and an opportunity to develop wonderful lifelong relationships with adult offspring."
Incredibly well said, MAN! Thanks for sharing that.
IlloWhy need a public opinion? Either charge rent and be done with it. Or don't and let it go. But that's not up to anyone other than you.
GC That sounds pretty cushy for him. What about electric he uses, internet, food, gas, water, and things you don't think of, like detergent: laundry usage, and SO much more.
I never asked mine for a cent. He just paid me monthly because he felt he worked full time and contributed. I didn't have to ask. You do have to ask. It's only fair, or he can move out and find out how much rent alone is without all the other things. Good luck to you and I hope everything works out great for both of you.
I want to thank everyone for taking the time to give me their thoughts on this.
It truly has been helpful
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